Crazy for sleep

Telluride Daily Planet, Friday, September 12, 2024

I can tell you exactly when I got the best sleep of my life, aside from childhood and adolescence: my mid 20s in NYC, in a “wrong movie” period, when I just wanted out after four years of city life. Where I actually landed — before moving away shortly thereafter — was in a Martha Graham-style modern dance class for beginners, getting my butt kicked leaping across the shiny wood floor. I would take the subway home and fall into my bed, a simple platform with a 100% cotton futon. 

There on that plank, I’d meld with the firm, cool cotton and not move until morning. It might have been exhaustion, depression, the firmness of the platform, or all three, but the sleep eventually reached mythical proportions in my mind. I don’t remember ever experiencing that kind of sleep again.

Sleep is one of the biggest health topics of the day, and a giant consumer marketplace. In addition to the thing itself, we are now dealing with stressing about not sleeping because of its very importance: for optimizing brain health performance and mood, maintaining levels of infection-fighting antibodies and cells, regulating appetite and hormone levels, and informing metabolic efficiency and wellness. Sleep is a blessing, and we all know it; we feel and look better when we’ve nailed it.

Throughout my life, including just recently, I have gone through periods of barely passable sleep — either not getting there, not staying there, or waking up too early for the day. For a long time — until menopause fifteen years ago — exercising vigorously seemed to be the best solution by far for me; but after that and for various reasons, things changed, and I have become one of the 30% of Americans working to get more and better sleep. 

In desperation, we try all the things other people swear by, even though every one of us is unique, and one person’s sleep treasure is another one’s trash. My current list of things that don’t work for me is long! Melatonin, CBD, valerian, homeopathic remedies and pretty much any pharmaceutical drug including sleep meds, benzodiazepines (valium), and even Benadryl which is a relatively harmless way to induce sleep and used to work for me on occasion. 

Not only do these things not work, they sometimes do more harm than good and tax one’s nervous systems even more. Diphenhydramine (Tylenol PM), for example, which works for many and which I periodically retest, gives me restless leg syndrome! 

A week or so ago, after taking my nightly magnesium, I flipped open to my bookmark in “A Well Lived Life” (secrets to health and happiness), a new book by 103-year-old Gladys McGary MD. Coincidentally, she happened to be talking about her experience of waking up in the night or not sleeping well. Her attitude about lighter sleep had mostly to do with the downsides and dangers of stressing about it. She wrote that she generally used the time to indulge in good memories or think more positive thoughts.  

Years ago, acting as a host for a VIP at one of the local film festivals, I had an opportunity to witness what lack of sleep could do to a person. This individual was used to the 100% effectiveness of the same European medication he had taken for 30 years — which simply was not working at altitude. He was  far beyond grumpy. I suggested oxygen, which he summarily declined, until, in desperation, he snagged an appointment at the med center where they prescribed… an oxygen machine. He passed out in a deep slumber that night and woke up just a smidgen nicer.  

So. If  you didn’t already know about hacking your sleep, here are some of the more popular tips and tricks: stick to a schedule for going to bed and waking up; don’t eat or drink anything too close to bedtime; give yourself at least an hour to unwind after shutting down all screens; limit overhead lighting at night; unplug the internet if possible; if you or someone else in your bed snores, try mouth tape or go to a different room; use progressive relaxation, breathing, or yoga nidra to relax; get bright sunlight into your eyes first thing in the morning; schedule a time to worry during the day. 

There are all manner of products to consider, as well: cooling mattresses, bamboo sheets, weighted blankets, white noise machines, storytelling apps, supplements like ashwagandha, jujube, L-theanine, GABA, tryptophan, magnolia, glycine, taurine and lots of others.  

Sometimes at 3 a.m. when me and my consciousness are not at their best, I walk out onto the bedroom deck stand there, even in winter, just to stare at the diamond strewn sky and let the hot and the bothered go. Because, the thing is, as Dr. McGary suggests, you can’t yank too hard on the leash of the dog of getting back to sleep or it will become more stubborn than ever.